Can You Really ‘Go Home’ Again? Moving Back In After College

For many American high school graduates, college is no longer an option. We live in a society where it is becoming more difficult to survive without a college degree. We spend all of our high school years preparing us to get into a good college, and our college career preparing for the “real world.”
They tell you that as long as you work hard, the benefits will come to you. I was always told, “If you work hard now, the rest of your life will be easy.” But what they don’t tell you is how difficult it is to have the opportunity to work hard. Yes, we can study hard in college, perhaps even graduate with honors. But then what? Students have spent the last twenty years of their lives in school, but now they are pushed into a world that does not let them in unless they pay the toll. In other words, how are graduates expected to become part of the “real world” if it doesn’t let them in?
Students memorize facts, write papers, and take exams so they may be prepared for what is in store post-graduation. However, with today’s economy, it seems as though there is no room for them. Job requirements are becoming more demanding and increasing their requirements. While some jobs ask for a higher degree than a bachelor’s, some request years of experience. This is where the problem lies: how are students to gain experience if they are not given the opportunity to?
Students Returning Home After College are Forced to Regress
For almost all college students, this time in their life is the place in which they are given the chance to break free from their parents. They no longer have a curfew or are being told what to eat. Students feel like they are independent and they gain the experience needed to live on their how. The problem lies in how to do this.
Once students graduate, it is hard to find a job. Without means to support themselves, they are forced to move back in with Mom and Dad. There is unavoidable tension between the parents and the child, which leads to more and more stress. If they are lucky, the parents do not have to worry about finding a job for themselves, so they seem to forget what it is like looking for one. They assume that the reason their kid is unemployed is laziness, rather that lack of availability. What does this mean? More tension and escalated stress. No matter how you look at it, it doesn’t seem to be a favorable situation for anyone.
How Can Students Adjust to Life Back at Home?
In order to try and alleviate some tension in the house, there are some things that both the parent and the student may be able to try. First of all, students must realize that they will not get their dream job fresh out of school. They must understand that there is no shame in any job. They may feel over qualified to work in some jobs, but that is the time where they may try and gain experience in a particular field.
Also, they must remember that a job is a job. It is too hard to not have a job, where it creates problems like lack of money, an abundance of free time, and added stress from their parents. Don’t forget, it is never too late to think about going back to school, even if it is part-time. If money is a problem, then work in a job that may not be your favorite for a few months to help you earn money. Save money! Students need to realize how much the “real world” really costs, so it is important not to splurge on hot new shoes.
Finally, it is unbelievable how much helping out around the house will make things better. Showing effort and taking some responsibility at home will not only show the parents that they are willing to help, but it will make the student feel like less of a free-loader.
How Parents Can Help College Student Adjust
Although it can be easy to find fault, parents must try to see things from their child’s perspective. Living within the boundaries of today’s economy makes it much harder to find any kind of job. So, parents need to try to not put added stress on their child when it comes to employment. Chances are, children are already feeling badly about the rejection from potential employers, so they not need you telling them that they need to try harder.
What might also be beneficial to both the parents and the child is if the parents try not to expect their child to be a CEO within 5 years of graduation. They must try to understand that times have changed from when they were job searching, so their expectations must not be set top their child having a career right away.
Finally, the parents must try to appreciate the small steps that their child is trying to make. They should try and be grateful for their child having the house spotless or toying with the idea of returning to school. Bottom line: be supportive. It will mean more to your child than he lets you believe.
These subtle, easy steps will help making the move back home a little less painful and little more productive!

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